Thursday, April 1, 2010

between a doctor & a patient



Doctor, doctor, I keep losing my memory.
When did you first notice it?
When did I first notice what?

Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a dustbin.
Don't talk rubbish.

Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a snail.
Don't worry, we'll soon have you out of your shell.

Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking that I'm a frog
Go on, hop it!

Doctor, doctor, these pills you gave me for BO are no use.
What's wrong with them?
They keep slipping from under my arms.

Doctor, doctor! I feel like a sheep.
That's baaaaaad.

Doctor, doctor! I'm becoming invisible.
Yes I can see you're not all there.

A boy called the doctor..
"Doctor, doctor come quick, my younger brother has just swallowed my pen."
"I'll be right over - what are you doing in the meantime?"
"I'm using a pencil..."

Patient: Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pencil.
Doctor: Can you get to the point.

Doctor, doctor, my son's just swallowed some gunpowder.
Well, don't point him at me.

Patient: 'Doctor, my wooden leg keeps giving me the most awful pain.'
Doctor: 'Don't be ridiculous! How can a wooden leg give you pain?'
Patient: 'My wife keeps hitting me on the head with it.'

DOCTOR: Well, Mr Jones, I can't find anything wrong with you. It must be the drink.
MR JONES: Okay, Doctor, I'll come back in the morning when you're sober.

'Doctor, doctor, little Jimmy has a saucepan stuck on his head. Whatever shall I do?'
'Don't worry, you can borrow one of mine. I'm going out for dinner."

'Doctor, doctor, I keep stealing things. Can you give me something for it?'
'Try these pills. And if they don't work, bring me back a DVD player."

'Doctor, :doctor, I think I must be invisible. Everyone ignores me.'
'Next, please.'

DOCTOR" The pain in your right leg is caused by old age.
OLD MAN : But my left leg is the same age and that doesn't hurt.

Last summer a doctor and his family were at the beach having a good time. All of a sudden the doctor spotted a dorsal fin sticking out of the water and fainted. When he came to, his wife said, "You have to be less paranoid, dear. That was only a shark. Stop imagining that there are lawyers every- where."

This man went to the doctor. He said, 'Doctor, my nose runs and my feet smell.'
The doctor said, 'You're built upside down.'

This woman went to the doctor. She said, 'Doctor, my husband thinks he's a cat.'
The doctor said, 'How do you know that?' She said, 'Well every night, when I go to bed, there's this horrible howling outside the window.'
The doctor said, 'Yes, but are you sure that that's your husband?'
She said, 'Well a cat wouldn't use language like that.'

The doctor said to this chap, 'I'm afraid you've only got five minutes left to live.'
The chap said, 'Doctor that's terrible. What can you do for me?'
The doctor said, 'I'll boil you an egg if you like.'
jokes about doctors

2 jejak ditinggalkan:

Shafiqa Mohd said...

hahaha.
lawak lah sab. ;)

sabby sabrina said...

sjak ble ko pggl ak sab? bkn ke bdak tkc pggl ak sabby :P

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